How to Seat Single Guests at Your Wedding Reception

INVITE THEM PLUS ONE

There are two schools of thoughts with this: some couples follow the ‘no ring, no bring’ rule to minimize costs, while others include a plus one on every invite. No solution fits every circumstance. But, if you have single friends, speak to them first and see if they want to bring anyone. Don’t presume they don’t. And don’t force them to come alone.

MAKE THEM FEEL INCLUDED

Weddings celebrate love. And if your friend is going through a bit of a ‘loveless’ patch, this might prove painful. Don’t single them out for being single: make sure they are invited to all the events related to the Big Day and make a conscious effort to understand their point of view. It may be a celebration of your love, but it will be much more special if everyone is happy and comfortable.

DON’T SEAT THEM ON THE COUPLES TABLE

Or rather, make sure you have a mix of coupled up and singleton friends on the table by balancing out the numbers. Don’t segregate them unless those single friends attending are close and you know they will have a good time together. The general guideline is to have three couples and three single friends on a table for nine. While that’s not a hard-and-fast rule, the principle is clear: no one likes to sit around like a lemon, feeling out-of-place.

DON’T PUT THEM ON THE FAMILY TABLE

Yes, they may know your aunt and your grandmother. But that’s no reason to seat them together with the rest of your, or your partner’s, family. Especially if your relatives are at least 30 years older, and especially if they have the tendency to drink. Being asked for the umpteenth time ‘why are you single?’ or told ‘don’t worry, you’ll meet someone when you least expect it’ is no one’s idea of fun.

SEAT THEM WITH FRIENDS THEY ARE COMFORTABLE WITH

Organising a seating plan is no mean feat. It takes time and effort, two things which are in short supply close to the Big Day, and overthinking where to place your single friends can be headache inducing. Probably the most important thing to keep in mind is to place single friends with others they feel comfortable with. And be sure to include friends of friends on a particular table so you avoid cliques, which might result in your friend being left out of the conversation.

CONSIDER AN IRREGULAR SEATING LAYOUT

This may be far from the traditional set up, but gives a casual, intimate feel to your wedding reception: include different tables and seating arrangements such as large tables, couches, benches or pouffes and eliminate a formal seating plan. Let your guests, including those coming alone, choose their seats, allowing them to move things around should they feel like. This means that no one gets preference and your single friends will just feel like one of the gang.

DON’T PLAY BLIND DATE

Just because they’re single, it doesn’t mean they will be attracted to your other single friends. Don’t attempt to pair people up at your wedding, even if the temptation is strong to see love blossom. After all, the man you might find charming could be, in the eternal words of Bridget Jones, your friend’s idea of a ****wit. It would be embarrassing and awkward if things don’t go well and your reception will be remembered for the time they spent trying to hide from each other.

BE CONSIDERATE

Sometimes ‘single’ can feel like a personality trait, a bad smell you can’t get rid of or a funky hit on the dancefloor. However your friend feels about their status, take nothing for granted. Show a little sensitivity and common sense and, if in doubt about anything, ask them.

DON’T THROW THE BOUQUET

Reality check: they’re your used flowers. This may be one of the most enduring of wedding traditions but it’s also one of the most awkward. Lining up all your single friends (in a blatant act of discrimination) and asking them in a circus-animal-like way to jump for your wilting roses is the ultimate offense. Like men, flowers should not be handed down to your besties.