We’re not going to sugar coat it – a maid of honour (just like the best man), bears a lot of the load when it comes to helping her BFF and bride-to-be with wedding preparations. But there’s a lot of pride to be had in knowing that YOU are the chosen one to be by that person’s side on one of the most important days of her life.

Knowing what your responsibilities are on the day will help ensure a smooth process from beginning to end. So here they are.

1. Coordinating the bridal party

Especially on the day but also in the weeks leading up to the wedding, you’ll need to take over directing the bridesmaids from the bride-to-be. From a certain point onwards (you’ll know when, the bride will tell you), you will need to run through their duties, remind them of their responsibilities on the day and for the bachelorette, and follow-up with them about fittings for their dresses, among a bunch of other things.

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2. Delegate, to a certain extent

Having a troupe of bridesmaids means that you can share the load, but there’s a reason why your BFF put you in charge and not someone else, and that’s to take the lead and handle the most important things relating to the big day. It’s fine to delegate of course, but you’re the coordinator in chief on this occasion, and your responsibilities should live up to the title.

3. Take charge of small tasks

These tasks can be among the most cumbersome and often time consuming, but that’s why you’re taking care of them and not the bride-to-be (who also has a lot on her plate, and who needs to just relax on her wedding day). From helping with assembling souvenirs to spreading the word about the couple’s wedding list, or collecting gifts on the day and putting them in a safe place to joining the bride for final fittings, you need to make yourself as dispensable as possible for this big occasion.

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4. Fixing the bride’s dress

Another obvious task, but one of significant importance, is for the maid of honour to be at hand to fix the bride’s dress and/or veil during the ceremony. Even if the bride doesn’t opt for a puffy ball gown which is difficult to handle, she’ll still need assistance fanning out her dress and veil, ensuring it’s perfect for those keepsake wedding photos.

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5. Be a hostess

While it almost goes without saying that the maid of honour is responsible for organising and coordinating the bride’s bachelorette, she might also need to play hostess at the wedding reception, when the couple and their parents are busy mingling with and greetings guests. That includes advising guests where to place or who to give gifts too, to sign the guest book, to show them where to sit, where the rest rooms are, and so on.

6. Keep some things at hand

The bride might ask you to keep her lipstick, hold on the wedding rings for the ceremony, or keep a hanky handy for when those tears start to roll. Holding on to these items will mean you’ll either need to carry a small bag with you, put them in the pockets of your dress, or cleverly hide them somewhere that’s easily accessible, like in your wedding bouquet, for when the time comes.

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7. Have a blast with your bestie

This might all seem like an overload of tasks and responsibilities, but careful preparation beforehand will only mean a smooth process on the day, and after the more serious tasks are dealt with, you can hang up your heels, let your hair down, and celebrate this new journey with your girlfriend one of the biggest days of her life.

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