All those tying the knot know that planning a wedding can be stressful at times. But for local bride Kelsey Vella Cuschieri, planning her big day to now-husband Malcolm couldn’t have been more of a rollercoaster ride.
Kelsey tells us that she never pictured herself walking down the aisle. “I was never the one who dreamt of ever getting married,” she admits. “Whenever that thought would come to mind I would just shake it off. Being the centre of attention for even just a day only brought to my mind fear and anxiety of how people will see me and sometimes the harsh comments that follow. Everyone close to me knows that I never in a million years envisioned tying the knot!”
“I have always had issues with my weight, tried several diets and programmes but never managed to get myself back on track or stick to it,” she says. “As soon as I finished my degree, juggling with work, home construction and wedding planning left me no time to focus on my well-being. Yes I’m really terrible with juggling time and planning for myself. Sometimes we plan time for everything and everyone except for ourselves!”
She remembers the kinds of comments she received when they were planning the wedding. “’Now, go on a diet so you will look great’ was a common one. I do know that their concern was for my well-being, however it just made me feel like I was not allowed to be a bride because of my size,” Kelsey shares.
“I had never suffered from anxiety and never had panic attacks in my whole life, however little did I know that I was in for a ride. The more the wedding was approaching, the more people were telling me, ‘Oh, you will surely loose some kilos, there’s a year left!’, ‘Hurry up, time is ticking’, ‘You will soon go dress shopping, do some effort and lose some weight.’ In February 2019, we moved in together and I did feel much better cooking our own food and experimenting with recipes. However life started becoming busier than ever and sometimes cooking a plate of pasta was much faster and easier than preparing some healthy meal,” Kelsey admits.
In January, Kelsey went dress shopping and realised it was quite easy to find dresses to fit into. She found her dream dress at the fifth and final store they visited – Eva Mariee. “I always wanted long sleeves to hide my arms and a fitted dress not to look bigger than I am. The Kenneth Winston dress I chose was strapless, even though I loved it I did have my doubts, but James Xuereb the owner assured me that it wouldn’t be a problem to add sleeves.” She did however make some changes, and added a skirt, too. “I ended up ordering a tulle-skirt to wear for the church ceremony which I ended up loving so much as it totally transformed the dress and made me feel so much comfortable.”
But, things went a little off track two months before the wedding. “I went in for my alterations and I was shocked with how much weight I had gained over the last few months as the corset could not even close! I felt ashamed of myself and destroyed that I let myself get to that stage, I didn’t tell many people that the dress did not fit as I could not take the “I told you so” comments.”
Thankfully, she had support from her partner and her bridal team who helped her get in shape for her big day. “I hopped on the keto diet right away and managed to loose 10kg and fit back nicely in my dress. Having a bridal team who fully supported me in every crazy idea I came up with and helped me with every step of the way was truly amazing, I could not have done it if it wasn’t for them.”
The big day was upon them, and Kelsey and Malcolm woke up on 30thNovember knowing that they were about to exchange vows. But Kelsey was still a little anxious to say the least about how the day would pan out. “I was terrified of hearing people saying why I chose such a dress for my figure and how fat I looked. I just wanted the whole thing to be over and done with. Little did I know how much fun I was going to have!”
“We got married at St Publius Church Floriana, my hometown. When I saw Malcolm crying his heart out, that was it! I had no idea of what was happening, all the fear I had of tripping over the stool (yes my mind goes to all sorts of places!) was nothing but nonsense.”
Their ceremony was followed by a reception at Castello Dei Baroni and Kelsey admits everything went off without a hitch. “As we walked in I wanted to cry with happiness! It is just a beautiful experience walking into your wedding venue and seeing everything that you had imagined and pictured even more beautiful than ever!”
“It was the most memorable moment for us all through the reception, it is every couple’s dream to see each and every single guest of every age having so much fun. All those months of daily breakdowns, panic attacks and constant anxiety had proven to be utter nonsense.”
“I married the love of my life, I was allowed to be a bride even though I was plus-size, no one stopped me from doing so! We had a wedding beyond our wildest dreams; people are still messaging us about how much fun they had.”
Kelsey has a piece of advice for those preparing to tie the knot. “And the most important piece of advice: DO NOT tell anyone your plans for the wedding unless they need to know, people will question your choices and then you will start questioning it yourself, stand your ground and go with your instinct, it’s your day – welcome all opinions but weigh them wisely.”
Shane P. Watts Photography