22nd September 2016

6 Things you Should Never Wear as a Wedding Guest

Weddings are a fabulous occasion where you can dress up however you want. Wait, no, that’s Halloween. Here are six things you absolutely shouldn’t wear at weddings.

1. Wearing white

It seems pretty obvious to us, but at almost every wedding, you’ll see a lady wearing something dangerously close to the colour that the bride is wearing. Unless you’ve been specifically instructed to wear white as part of the dress code, steer away from snowy-coloured garments (and also ivory, off-white and cream, just to be on the safe side). White accents are fine though!

2. Visible underwear

For the ladies: when choosing the dress you’ll be wearing, please consider the underwear that’s going, well, underneath. If it’s so low-cut that the top of your bra is showing, the dress may not be appropriate for a wedding in the first place. If your straps keep sliding down, you need a new bra.

For the gents:  Please pull those pants up. If they’re too baggy, invest in a nice belt. Or a new pair of trousers. Or both. It won’t kill you.

3. Animal print

When I was young and kind of stupid, I once went to a wedding in a leopard-print dress because I thought it was really hot (to be fair it was 2007, and there’s even less of an excuse in 2016). I spent the whole evening feeling like Tarzan being introduced to civilised society – kind of embarrassed and totally out of place. There’s a time and place for everything and a wedding really isn’t the place to show off how much of a wild thang you are.

(The only exception is Beyoncé who can wear whatever she wants, whenever she wants)

4. Short-sleeved shirts

I know it can get really hot in summer (read: April to October), but short-sleeved shirts are way too informal of a look to be worn to a wedding. Even if it’s a more casual and relaxed affair, you’ll look much better if your long sleeves are rolled up. It’s better than making the rest of the guests wonder why there’s a bus driver who abandoned his shift halfway through walking amongst them.

5. Head-to-toe black

As Maltese women, we often tend to gravitate towards black because it’s slimming (and because it’s harder to notice red wine stains on dark material.) But lighten up a bit, Morticia Addams! Why not try a festive print? Some cheerful detailing? No? Well, at least accessorise with something a little less sombre – a brightly-coloured clutch bag or a lively pair of shoes. It’s a wedding, not a funeral.

6. Jeans

Jeans are great! We love jeans! We’re in jeans almost every day of the week – which is exactly why they don’t belong at a wedding. It’s a special occasion! Dress up a little! If you have to go for a casual or informal look, choose chinos. Smart jeans do NOT count as dressing up.

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