Although we live in an age of supposed gender equality, the idea of a woman proposing to a man is still so rare that it boggles the mind. A woman may desperately want to marry her partner, but they’re not expected to be the one popping the question. Instead, we’re supposed to sit back and hope for the best, have detailed discussions with our friends about when he’ll pop the question, and just keep wondering, at every sunset dinner or walk on the beach – “Could this be the moment?”
Proposing is scary – after all you’re asking a person to spend the rest of their life with you, and that’s intimidating no matter if you’re a boy or a girl. You may start imagining all sorts of crazy scenarios. What if he says no? What if he’s not that into you after all? (Yes, even after years together, your brain may still come up with these nightmare situations). And as women, we find it more difficult to ask for what we want – we’ve been told all our lives not to be too pushy or too greedy! But screw all that. It may be one of the scariest conversations you ever have in your life – but if it’s what you want, go ahead and ask for it.
We turned to the Facebook group WeddingTalk to hear from women who took the plunge and proposed to their husbands. Here are three of their stories.
Tiziana
“We had only been dating for seven months. We started in February and I proposed in September. I didn’t propose in the most romantic way! I texted him the proposal whilst we were in front of a takeaway shop with his parents – he was right next to me! He stared at the message, looked at me, stared at the message again, and said, “We should talk about this when we go home.” But it worked! We’re now only three weeks away from the wedding.”
Linda
“I was 36 and my husband was 38. I told him that after six years of being together, and having our beautiful daughter in 1991, that if I’m good enough to live with, and good enough to have your baby, I’m good enough to marry – so we did! That was 23 years ago – sounds really old-fashioned now!”
Charlene
“We had discussed it more than once but I was fed up of waiting! After we had our son, who is now a year old, I texted him, asking, “Do you want us to get married?” And we agreed. On the 14th July, I’ll finally be a Mrs!”
Henri Meilhac /unsplash