“We were thrown into the deep end a little when we moved here – we had never lived in the same country and suddenly we were living in the same apartment!” - Victoria

 “My father was a South African diplomat, and his first post as ambassador was in Portugal. I was sent to the St Julian’s British International School, which is where I first met Jamie, when I was 10 and he was 11. Jamie and his friend were the jokers in class. My surname is Swanepoel, and he thought I looked like a Siamese cat, so he gave me a horrible nickname – Swanamiese. I hated cats at the time – I was a total dog person. Despite that, I still thought he was cute.”

“We were in school together for three-and-a-half years before my parents moved back to South Africa. Life carried on and we went on a number of further posts, but St Julian’s remained my favourite school. So when I was invited to the 10-year reunion, I couldn’t wait to go. The night before the reunion, we were all invited to a before party at a bar in Cascais, Portugal, which was where Jamie and I met again. The first thing I said to him was ‘don’t call me Swanamiese’, but of course to this day he still does!”

“After a few days in Portugal, I headed back home to South Africa. We kept in touch, and he invited me on two holidays to Europe, including one to Malta. Life got in the way and I couldn’t make either trip. Eventually I asked Jamie to visit me in South Africa. We had a great holiday together, but we still weren’t too worried about the future. A few months after that, I went to visit my best friend and Jamie in London. After another wonderful holiday, including a weekend break to Malta, we decided we needed to make some sort of plan.”

“At the time, my parents were living in Bucharest, Romania. Work permits in the UK for South African citizens were at the time going through a particularly complicated period, so moving to the UK wasn’t really an option. So for two years we flew back and forth between England and Romania. I was working as an event co-ordinator for the South African Embassy, which meant I would work very hard for a couple of months and then have weeks of free time. It was very lucky for us as it meant I could visit London for a couple weeks every three months or so.”

“Long distance relationships make you really appreciate each other, and make every second count when you’re together. There’s no way an LDR can work without trust and commitment, because the distance just magnifies jealousies and insecurity, so you really have to learn to trust each other. But even so, being so far apart gets lonely. You go out with a lot of coupled-up friends and feel left out because your partner isn’t there. It hurts especially during occasions like weddings. Sometimes we would try to get a hold of each other over the phone or online and keep missing each other, which was frustrating. Jamie isn’t big into technology so we never video chatted. I really missed seeing his face.”

“Eventually Jamie found out he could transfer to the Malta office of the company he was working with at the time. We had both loved it during our short visit and decided it was a good fit for us. We were thrown into the deep end a little when we moved here – we had never lived in the same country and suddenly we were living in the same apartment! Even though we had spent long periods of time together in the past, there was always sort of a holiday vibe to it. But this was real life, and we had to get used to each other’s quirks very quickly. However, we’ve now been here for five-and-a-half years, and while there have been plenty of obstacles and ups and downs, overall I think we are both thrilled that we managed to make it work. We also have a cat, and I am now both a cat and a dog person!”

“When you’re in a long-distance relationship, I think it important that you find a way to remain in each other’s daily lives. We would sometimes discuss mundane things like the movies we watched, or what we had eaten, but I think speaking about these little things makes you feel involved in each other’s lives. I also think it is important that there is some plan to be together in the future. I think it is probably easier if you start off long distance and eventually get to live in the same place, because that way, the relationship is built from the ground up.”