1. Communicate more
And we don’t only mean about the little things, for example who is going to get the shopping, cook and clean. Open up to your spouse about your thoughts and feelings – those movements in the inner recesses of your mind – and you’ll find yourselves growing closer and closer as time goes by.
2. Go on a date once a week
Step off the merry-go-round and take some time to enjoy each other’s company – as you used to do in the old days. You don’t need to spend much money; the only provisos are that the time should be dedicated to the two of you and should allow you to slip out of your daily lives to recreate those emotions which tie you together.
3. Say ‘I Love You’ often and without reservation
It’s easy to forget to do this in our day-to-day lives. After all, how many of us frequently say these essential three words even to our parents and siblings! But, hearing ‘I love you’ floods the body with positive feelings and thoughts – just remember to say it back!
4. Empathise
Especially when you’re in the midst of an argument. Make an effort to try to understand your spouse’s point of view, even if you don’t agree with it. This will help you both find a resolution faster and you can get on with enjoying each other’s friendship. Don’t make your life together a battlefield but hold on to the connections which brought you together.
5. Go to bed at the same time
This may seem like something small, but it does make a big difference. Going to bed at the same time helps you become closer and gives you both the space you need – together – to talk to each other about anything that is on your mind. Once you shut that bedroom door, it is only about the both of you and should remain that way.
6. Don’t go to bed angry
Of course, the corollary to number 5 is to make sure to clear up any unresolved anger BEFORE you go to bed. Never let an argument stain the night ahead, for if you go to sleep furious with each other, it’s very likely you’ll wake up feeling the same way. And, life’s too short to remain bitter for long.
7. Decide on a project or activity you can do together
You both have your jobs, and you may also have a couple of kids rattling about, but plan to create something new together (and as a family if you have rugrats). This could be some renovations, should you not mind the hassle, or a trip abroad. You could both even take on a regular new activity, such as cycling, art or trekking, to keep the fun going on for longer.
8. Try something new each month
It’s funny how quickly time passes and, before you know it, another year has ended and you have nothing new to show for it. So, on both a personal level and for your relationship, make an effort to think of something new to do each month. It could be something simple, like cooking a dish you’ve never tried before, or it could even involve a much bigger overhaul. Whatever it is, do it together.
9. Kiss each other every morning
We love morning kisses! (who doesn’t?). And what better way to get the day going than to feel that warm emotion as soon as you wake up? Physical contact is a sure-fire way of signalling your love and communicating your affection to your spouse – whether you’ve been married for 1 year, 10 or 30.
10. Have even more sex!
This hits so many boxes: you spend time together, away from the daily grind; you indulge in each other’s company and you can experiment by trying a new position or getting some action away from the matrimonial bed. And, while every couple has its own rhythm when it comes to consensual relations, next year might be the one you take it to a whole new level.