We’ve all been to our fair share of weddings in Malta, and a large gathering full of hot-tempered, feisty people combined with free-flowing alcohol is bound to get messy – and how. We asked The Salott to hit us with their craziest wedding stories – here are eleven of our favourites.
1. The one with the politician
“Years ago, we went to a wedding that was held on Election Day. One of the guests was a political candidate. All of a sudden, the guests hauled him up on their shoulders and started singing party songs! I felt like I was at a mass meeting!”
2. The one with the drunk wedding guest
“A super drunk guest wandered up to the wedding cake and started cutting it themselves!”
3. The one with the passed-out bride
“The bride got too drunk and passed out on the couch during the reception. The groom had to cut the cake with her father instead!”
4. The one at a wild wedding
“We were invited to a wedding where the guests were a little wild! They were all dancing and leaping about, with handbags flying all over the place. One of the guests was wearing tight white trousers, and he jumped about so much that he split his trousers from front to back! He ended up in his underwear, but he really didn’t seem bothered – it certainly didn’t stop him from dancing!”
5. The one with the posh nosh
“I once saw a posh woman emptying a whole tray of Baci into her large handbag.”
6. The one with the usher-bouncers
“The craziest thing I ever saw were ushers checking the attendees at the wedding against a list before entering, and to check if the customary monetary gift was given. It was being collected at the entrance before the guests were allowed in!”
7. The one where the groomsmen dressed like waiters
“The waiters’ uniforms looked exactly like the waistcoats that the bride’s father, the best man, and the ushers were wearing. Thank goodness the groom was wearing something different! Obviously, none of them could take their suit jacket off, because the headwaiter refused to have his waiters take off their waistcoats!”
8. The one with the plastered guests
“At a wedding I had attended, the guests drank so much that the bar ran out halfway through! The man behind the bar just packed up and went home. At the end of it all, everyone was throwing up and being physically carried out of the venue.”
9. The one where the food ran out
“At one wedding I went to, drinks weren’t the problem – even worse, there wasn’t enough food for all the guests. We ended up at McDonald’s a few hours later and practically all of the guests were tucking in there!”
10. The one with the terrible wedding present
“When my child got married, one of their guests gave them a small vase in a children’s shoebox! It didn’t stop them from drinking until they threw up, though!”
11. The one with the extensions
“I usually wear my hair up so when I wore it down for my wedding, all my guests were asking me if that was my real hair or whether they were extensions. I spent a whole evening telling them that was my real hair, but it didn’t stop one woman from pulling on it to make sure it was really mine!”