THE DONT'S
Wear white
If you’re a woman, and you’re not the bride, it’s the height of bad manners to show up to a wedding in white. (If you’re a man, and you’re in white, you might be John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever, but you’re not strictly speaking breeching etiquette).
Show up late
This is especially true if you’re attending the ceremony. You don’t want to cause a kerfuffle at the back of the church or wherever the vows are being exchanged. Show up before it starts or not at all.
Get drunk
Yes, it’s an open bar, and it’s nice to get a little merry, but you should be old enough to know your limits and not cause a scene by getting absolutely shit-faced. Drink a glass of water between each alcoholic drink, and keep your stomach lined with food (an easy enough task during most weddings).
Bring an uninvited plus-one
Most wedding invitations are addressed to you plus guest, but if it’s only addressed to you, you’ll have to bite the bullet and go solo. Also, if it doesn’t say ‘and family’, do not bring your kids along.
Do something that steals the couple’s thunder
I’m talking about those couples who think another couple’s big day is the perfect time to propose or announce that they’re having a baby. Spoiler alert – it’s not. If Prince Harry and Meghan Markle could let a couple of days pass between Princess Eugenie’s wedding and announcing that they’re expecting, so can you.
THE DO’S
RSVP
Letting the bride and groom know if you’ll be able to make it on their special day is not only good manners, but it also helps them get a better handle on the final cost of the event.
Let the couple know if you have any food allergies ahead of the wedding
If you’re allergic to gluten, shellfish or peanuts, it’s no use sulking that you can’t safely eat anything at the reception. You need to let the couple know ahead of time, so that their caterer can take the necessary precautions.
Attend the ceremony, not just the reception
In Malta, the rule of thumb seems to be that you only attend the ceremony and reception if you’re close friends or part of the family. But it’s nice to go to both parts of the wedding celebration, if you can manage to do so (especially if they’re getting married in a large church, like the Mdina Cathedral).
Be friendly and outgoing and have a good time
It can be a tough night if you don’t know that many people at the wedding, but try to stick to the ones that you do and be open to making new friends and acquaintances. The last thing the bride and groom want to see is a guest looking alone and miserable and necking vodka tonics.
Sign the guestbook
Sure it may seem a little cheesy, and after an evening of food and drink, you may not exactly be a fountain of sparkling wit, but it’s a lovely keepsake for the bride and groom, who will look back on it and remember all the details that might have got lost in the whirlwind of the day. Do it for them.